12 Things I Learned While Fighting With My Best Friend of 12 Years.
Over the course of the past three months, I had my differences with a person that has grown with me throughout the course of 12 years. It was an absolutely painful experience, but I'm glad to say we're on the other side of the fence & the worst of it is over. I wrote this as a reminder to not take long term friendships for granted, because as solidified as they are, they can still crack sometimes & require some tender loving care (or tough love).
Mild irritations can escalate to deeper things in a small instant without you even knowing what happened. You can't quite put your finger on it, but you know it shouldn't bother you as much as it does, and yet it does, and you cannot help but feel like something needs to be done, although you're not quite sure what.
Typing sentences without emojis and apt punctuations are sometimes a bad idea. No, it is always a bad idea. Because it makes you seem bitchy & cold, not grammatically correct.
There is no limit to how many times you can roll your eyes.
Words truly hurt, more so when they are not spoken directly to you, and delivered secondhand. Like you were not significant enough to warrant proper confrontation, that there was not enough faith that the friendship could survive such brutality.
While not all words said in anger are words from the heart, all words will strike you at the heart, and while you understand the circumstances in which they were said, the wound will still need to bleed before you can apply pressure & close it up.
There is merit to patience, but there is also merit to tough love & truth.
The timing to deliver tough love & truth is crucial for maximum effect. And by effect, I mean effectiveness.
As angry as you might feel, the minute an apology escapes your friend, you - like the sucker that you are - will forgive her. Do not deny this, ever because you can feel it in your body as she speaks to you through the tears in her eyes.
One argument in 12 years does not the break of a friendship make.
In fact, one argument in 12 years is a better track record than most people in any sort of relationship. Pat yourselves on the back for managing to love each other for so long.
Now love each other harder. Remember not to give up when your friend is seemingly lost, and have faith that in her way, she will come back to you.
Forever friendships aren't about cherishing good times. They're about surviving bad ones, and growing from them. So jump over the hurdle, and you'll both be okay.
4.37am, 14th July 2016
SB is a conflicted soul of sorts, who is mad enough to go chase after what she really loves as opposed to conform to society and her mother's idea of a successful person. She prays she makes it in life, because she will not be able to tolerate the nagging that would follow if she doesn't. Her inspiration comes from everything around her, as well as made up situations in her head. Good luck distinguishing between the two.