From SB: To A Deceased Person You Wish You Could Talk To

My godfather & I were very close when I was growing up. Diagnosed with lung cancer, he fought it for a good ten years, before succumbing to pneumonia in 2009. There's so much of me that is actually much of him, and I miss him every day. So this is to you Dee, whom I will never stop missing or writing for. 

 By the powers that be,
I would freeze the sun & drain the sea,
Just so you could be in front of me,
For me to say "Hey, Dee."

So many years since you didn't stay,
But when I think about you it always feels like just yesterday,
So many things you had yet to say,
I always feel like you were taken away.

Secretly I still don't know what I'm doing,
Life without you has been turbulent and harrowing,
There is no depth to the sorrow I will always be feeling,
Although over time there has been some minimal healing.

You would not be proud I do not think,
Of how I have pushed myself to the brink,
Trying always to hold on and not sink,
By the way I still hate pink.

Dee what I wouldn't give to have you here,
To once again hold you gently and near,
And to hear the sarcasm you whisper in my ear,
To hear you tell me to have no fear.

I hate that we're permanently apart,
The thought of it often breaks my heart,
From this world you had to depart,
But you were a father to me from the start.

I love you Dee and I always will,
Rest assured I think about you still,
When my dues arrive I will foot the bill,
And await the day you & I can once again chill.

- SB

3.31am, 18th May 2016

Ghetto HQ

SB is a conflicted soul of sorts, who is mad enough to go chase after what she really loves as opposed to conform to society and her mother's idea of a successful person. She prays she makes it in life, because she will not be able to tolerate the nagging that would follow if she doesn't. Her inspiration comes from everything around her, as well as made up situations in her head. Good luck distinguishing between the two.