Apologize First, Think Later.
This one goes out to all the ladies who have ever been emotionally abused in a relationship. This was me trying to capture that initial defeat one feels, and the self-loathing and slow chipping away of one's confidence. Emotional abuse is a very real form of abuse with very long lasting traumatic effects. Ladies it is important however to remember that it is very much survivable.
Say you're sorry.
Don't assess the facts but just apologize first, so he would be mildly appeased albeit still irritated at whatever it is he has convinced you is your latest crime, on your long rap sheet of perceived stupidity.
Do not look him in the eye.
Always look down in remorse and submission, remembering always your place in this world and that you shouldn't be so audacious as to ever look him in the eye.
Think simple thoughts.
Do not think about times when you were a spit fire, fuelled by music and movement and when you used to scream at bad drivers out your window. Think now only of his well-being and what you can do to feed his insatiable ego.
Because God forbid you have an opinion that differs from him, or you stand up to counter his ridiculous accusations that you know deep down are unwarranted and derive from the mental state of a child hiding in the body of a grown man who says he knows better.
God forbid you rise to the full potential of the woman that you are, and realize you really do not need this negativity & bullshit in your life and that you are capable of so much more than him, without him.
God forbid that happens,
So just apologize,
And think later.
10.36am, 29th September 2016
Seri Bukit Ceylon
SB is a conflicted soul of sorts, who is mad enough to go chase after what she really loves as opposed to conform to society and her mother's idea of a successful person. She prays she makes it in life, because she will not be able to tolerate the nagging that would follow if she doesn't. Her inspiration comes from everything around her, as well as made up situations in her head. Good luck distinguishing between the two.