let her love you

If there is one thing I have yet to figure out, it is how to stop loving someone completely. We wanted to be in each other's lives after breaking up, but I loved him when I knew I shouldn't. As time passed, I learnt to change my love him. This was written the day I let go the last bit of "relationship" love I had for him. We've both moved on and I still love him, but now, he's one of the greatest friends I have. :)

If she says she loves you but you don’t love her, don’t tell her just yet.

Let her sit in the silence with you,
shuffling in the awkwardness,
before she allows all that she feels for you to radiate from her skin and occupy the air around you.
Let her try and justify why she loves you,
though you both know that there’s no answer.
Let her face light up as she remembers
how the second freckle on your right cheek scrunched into a wrinkle on your face when you laughed while she told you about the time she fell into the drain in front of school.
Or how your face shined brighter than the fullest of moons when you spoke about the last good memory you had with your mom before her last breath.
Let her tell you about the times she thought of you before she went to bed,
and if you dare,
ask her how often she thinks of you, though you know the answer would scare you.
Let the few stubborn tear drops run down her face,
not because she’s sad, but thankful for having you in her life.
The tears will get heavier but it will be worth it.

Then,
let her tell you about the time she nicknamed you "comfort".
How you were the happy place in her head that kept her sane while the world was against everything she was and is, except you.
Let her reveal the art she has done with you in her heart and veins,
and with every word, every sentence and every rhyme,
know that her heart was beating the syllables of your name.

Let her tell you… that it’s okay.
It’s okay not to love her back because she understands,
that she doesn’t have much to offer and that you deserve better.
But if you listen closely, the echoes of her voice resonate her longing for you.

And if after all this, not an ounce of love is to be returned, let her go.
But don’t regret it, especially when her heart beats the name of another.

- Vanessa



 Despite having seen much suffering & injustice in the world, Vanessa Ee-Lyn Gomes still believes that her words can, someday, change people's lives for the better. She also believes that hugs are essential to make the world go 'round. Putting a tougher front as a journalist by day, she succumbs to being a hopeless romantic by night... though she knows Prince Charming is not on Tinder.

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