The Hypocrisy of Parenting
Wrote this while pondering on compliance, and filial piety. And what it does to mould children as individuals and if children really have a choice. Deep stuff. I think.
That is the burden the world inflicts on every child the minute it breathes life.
The minute a diaper is first changed, or milk is first suckled.
The debt of a child to a parent that is every growing, with interest.
Parents mould their children into the imagery of individuals of their choice.
They give their daughters a voice, but tell her she is not to raise it against her husband or mother-in-law.
They give their sons choices, but threaten to disown them if they bring back a non-prospective daughter-in-law.
They urge their children to forge friendships, but dictate the circles in which their children run.
"Don't be friends with THAT girl, she's no good for you." without even getting to know That Girl at all.
"That boy got no manners, he plays rough" they say about the ADHD child who is just beginning to learn to have fun.
As the hold of the totalitarian loosens, parents resort to guilt tripping & emotional blackmail.
Using disappointment to reinforce a child's self doubt about its individuality.
"I did not raise you to be this way."
"After everything I have given you, this is how you repay me."
They say it silently, but the words cut deep, and the child is once again put in its place.
Measuring a child's worth through their achievements,
Graduations, job offers and wedding engagements,
The yardstick grows longer and longer,
As the child grows wearier and older.
"Don't let people tell you what you should do", they say as they tell you what you must do.
"Listen to me, I know what's good for you."
They raise children to obey, not to grow.
At the end of the day, what is good or bad, only they know.
So comes the day the child becomes a parent itself,
Imposing upon this new creature of the world all these rules,
The cycle continues, at the end do we win or lose?
In a world filled with parental guilt, you tell me - your path in life, are you really allowed to choose?
- SB
4.00pm, 31st May 2016
Giant Kelana Jaya
SB is a conflicted soul of sorts, who is mad enough to go chase after what she really loves as opposed to conform to society and her mother's idea of a successful person. She prays she makes it in life, because she will not be able to tolerate the nagging that would follow if she doesn't. Her inspiration comes from everything around her, as well as made up situations in her head. Good luck distinguishing between the two.
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